No need to go to the beach...

...as you can get a much deeper tan in this La Gomera restaurant. The food there is pretty good, too.

Team up with fish and eat a friend

...according to this signage spotted by Martin Fagan in the Canaries and first published in the Telegraph:

... and don't forget to order fried dads (papas fritas) with your French-blue friend Gordon, the chicken.

Lanzarote salmon eat Prime Minister

Oh my God, not only do Lanzarote's vicious monster salmon eat the Prime Minister, they also gobble up the 'Royal House' before they get smoked in the town of Uga, according to this menu:

Thank God there are no salmon on Lanzarote !    (Image source: J. van Drimmelen)